“The frog jumped off the log and onto the blue lily pad” said a serious voice.
I wasn’t sure what to do with that information.
I wasn’t sure what to do with that information.
Kadie was on the other end of the phone, driving home from picking up Squealer from his preschool program.
“Hmmm” I replied, trying to match the gravity in her voice.
“You have no idea what that means, do you?”
Silence.
Finally, I said “Nope” popping the “p” as much like Black Adder as I possibly could.
She sighed wearily, reminded yet again about how often she must explain things to the other four members of the household, and with a voice of resignation said “All the kids in Squealer’s class have frogs with their names on them sitting on a log. When the kids misbehave, their frog jumps onto a blue lily-pad. If the kid continues to misbehave, the frog next jumps onto the red lily pad and a note goes home to their parents.”
A few minutes before, Squealer had gotten into the car and announced to his Mom that his frog “fell off the log” and onto the blue lily pad. I loved how he described the frog as “falling off,” thus absolving himself from all blame by characterizing himself as a helpless pawn who is merely the passive recipient of universal forces far beyond his ken.
As punishment, we grounded him from Words World.
{In an unrelated note, whenever Squealer gets out of his bed at night and starts roaming the house, Scooter normally sees him first. When she sees him she announces in an official sounding voice “The jelly has left the doughnut.” I’m unsure where she first heard this, but it never fails to induce laughter from me.}
“Hmmm” I replied, trying to match the gravity in her voice.
“You have no idea what that means, do you?”
Silence.
Finally, I said “Nope” popping the “p” as much like Black Adder as I possibly could.
She sighed wearily, reminded yet again about how often she must explain things to the other four members of the household, and with a voice of resignation said “All the kids in Squealer’s class have frogs with their names on them sitting on a log. When the kids misbehave, their frog jumps onto a blue lily-pad. If the kid continues to misbehave, the frog next jumps onto the red lily pad and a note goes home to their parents.”
A few minutes before, Squealer had gotten into the car and announced to his Mom that his frog “fell off the log” and onto the blue lily pad. I loved how he described the frog as “falling off,” thus absolving himself from all blame by characterizing himself as a helpless pawn who is merely the passive recipient of universal forces far beyond his ken.
As punishment, we grounded him from Words World.
{In an unrelated note, whenever Squealer gets out of his bed at night and starts roaming the house, Scooter normally sees him first. When she sees him she announces in an official sounding voice “The jelly has left the doughnut.” I’m unsure where she first heard this, but it never fails to induce laughter from me.}
5 comments:
I happened upon your blog yesterday and find it very interesting. (Family always is.)
My daughter also searches for ways to refocus responsibility away from herself. Sadly, many adults have never grown out of that habit. Lack of personal responsibility is one of my primary pet peeves about society today.
Must the hapless frog bear upon his back the sins of yet another generation?
JJFN,
Welcome! I do spend a lot of time of family issues with this blog. I don't think it's because our family is in any way unique or special...quite the opposite. I hope that most anyone could find things to which they can relate in this blog.
Bobby,
I think the teacher's disciplinary approach is Biblical. Have ye not read about the scapefrog in Leviticus 16???
WOW! My office mate won't quit staring at me...I just can't stop laughing at this one. Thanks for brightening my day!
OT Scholar,
Speaking of Leviticus 16 (which I just read this morning in my daily Bible study), what's the reference to Azazel in verse 8?
Thanks!
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